My christmas cold lingers and is wiping all traces of energy from me. My brain isn’t too bad but everything seems dulled. I have mental lists of things I could do, want to do, need to do – but no reserves at all with which to try.
My limited activities have been limited yet further – even the basics have been cut down. My spirits are fairly good, but prone to exasperation and frustation although even those feelings are dulled.
The virus is mainly in my sinuses and throat – dulling my hearing, grating on my throat, pressing on my face and sometimes with a spiking headache. Like my CFS although in this case much more rapid, the virus symptoms are cycling. Yesterday my voice and throat were much better, my sinus clearer but my cough going strong. Today I wake to no voice at all, restored now to at best a gravelly rumble – my throat is irritated, raw and dry, my sinuses dry and clogged, my hearing dulled once more.
I’m wishing Growler was fit and healthy but he too has the virus which does make for a useful comparison of my progress. I’m able to not be too despairing seeing how long it’s taking him to get over the virus and how wiped out he is. But of course this doesn’t help with feeling jolly about life – watching a poorly exhausted Growler tend to my needs when all he wants is to flop and rest.
So … it’s a time of trying to maintain a balance and perspective – to stop the bottom lip from trembling and reminding myself that things are OK. But managing to be or do or exist much outside of the body with it’s symptoms and irritants and annoyances is difficult right now.
Happy on the inside though.